jeudi 3 janvier 2013

Sometimes you fall for the right person in the wrong time


You know that saying: "when it's right, it's right" ? Or Barney Stinson's line from one episode of How I Met Your Mother: “Sometimes you fall for someone you'd never expect, but that doesn’t make it wrong. Doesn't everyone deserve to be happy?" Well, truth is, falling for someone is not always that simple.

If you're lucky, you'll fall for someone right in the right time, and things will go perfectly. You'll meet someone at some random place, and then you'll go on few dates before you'll both finally tell each other how much you enjoy the time you spent together. You'll go hand by hand strolling around the city. You'll have some disputes caused by simple things like whose turn it is to choose today's Ben&Jerry's flavor or which pizza place you will go this weekend. You'll share the same curiosity on things that other people won’t care, like whether Pokemon can reproduce or not. In short, you'll be in the kind of relationship that you can compare to Marshall-Lily's or even Monica-Chandler's.

But sometimes, you fall for the wrong person. Sometimes you meet someone who is incredibly hot or charming and you fall under his/her spell. You'd do anything to grab his/her attention. And if you're lucky enough to have his/her attention, you'll do anything to keep it that way. That other person might treat you like trash, yet you'd still be there, hopelessly clinging to that thing you believe as love. Then you'll eventually come to your senses and decide to leave the person. Or he/she might dump you first. You'll weep or curse, but in the end you'll manage because you know that's for the best. You'll move on and continue the search of your perfect match.

But what's worse than falling for the wrong person is falling for the right person in the wrong time. Maybe it's your last three weeks of your exchange program when you suddenly get closer to that guy you've never talked to much and you found out that you have many things in common, plus he's cute and he actually fits in your top 3 characteristics of people you find attractive. You might still be in a relationship that you're sure will go nowhere but you still have the decency not to cheat before its officially over. You also know that the odds are not in your favor because in 3 weeks you'll move to other city and he's going home. And your country is far away from his. And you're not rich enough to buy plane tickets to go there. You're not even sure if the feeling is mutual. Maybe he's nice to everybody, or is it just to you? But one thing, you sure know that your feeling is real. You might fall for him fast, but you fall deeply. You haven't had this kind of crush since years ago, with your high school sweetheart. And finally, you know it's right because...it's right. But you can’t do anything. You can only enjoy your last moments together, of enjoying Christmas lights, deciding which boulangerie has the best croissant, eating chocolate covered apple from the town Christmas market, singing childhood songs, and playing charades. And its finally time to say goodbye. He goes back to his country, you move to another city.

Jason Mraz says in his song, "Timing's everything". I tell you this, sometimes timing's a bitch. You finally find what you've been looking for, but you have to leave it all behind. You have little chance to pursue that happiness. And that hurts for sure.

So, if you're lucky enough to fall for the right person in the right time, i congratulate you and i hope you cherish it. But if you're in love with the right person but in the wrong time, all i have to say is: i feel you, bro. Here's some advice for you (and me, maybe): Seize the moments you have left. Make a choice. Make a move, if it's what you really want. Don't be too shy and calculating, as it is better to feel ashamed later rather than to constantly ask yourself what things will be if you had made the bold move for years and years. Don't over-think things, you might not have that much of time. Don't give up on what you want. Yes, timing sometimes sucks, but you can beat it. You can get what you want, only with extra extra effort. Even if you fail, at least you know you've tried. Because in the end, you know that you deserve to get what you want. You deserve to be happy.

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