Boyfriends may come and go, girlfriends stay forever :)

We're not just another girl-gang. Weve been together since-what? forever?
Anyway, i just love you all. Thanks for staying with me for these past 14 years ;)

What future holds

So, they were right. Senior year is not that easy and this year you need to be much more mature and be able to choose your next path.

i hate choosing, why cant i have all that i want? but that's the point of growing up, isnt it? to be able to choose between life's choices. (and i hate growing up, i'd love to be forever 17, young, careless and lively)

Anyway, i'm not gonna whine again, i'm just gonna talk about choosing my next educational path. College.

People always say to follow my heart my passion, and dont take majors that i dont like or just bcos my parents want me to. But, hello? what about being realistic? Seenaknya mengikuti kata hati dan passion mungkin segombal bicara cinta-cintaan sinetron, cinta buta dan gapeduli hal lainnya, dalam kata lain tolol. emangnya bisa bertahan cuma dengan cinta? emangnya mau makan cinta doang pas gede ntar? Sama seperti passion. Mungkin memang ada orang-orang yang mengikuti passionnya dan sukses, dan tentu saja bisa makan dari penghasilannya tersebut. Tapi mayoritas orang mencoba realistis, dan kembali menjadi kapitalis yang hanya memikirkan bagaimana bisa hidup nyaman tanpa kekurangan.

Kalau mau ikutin apa yang sebenernya saya mau, saya bakal milih Jurnalistik atau sastra atau hukum internasional, atau yang paling aneh mungkin bakal jadi artis (obsesi terkenal). I love to write and tell stories, tapi saya bukan (belum) jadi seperti Sitta Karina ataupun Raditya Dika yang jago merangkai kata kata jadi suatu karya yang menarik dan berkesan.But one thing, i know that writing and telling stories are one of my passions. Yang lainnya adalah saya mau jadi orang yang bisa merubah hidup orang banyak, seperti presiden atau mungkin sekedar volunteer PBB. Yang jelas, saya ngga mau berakhir jadi mbak-mbak kantoran yang masuk pagi pulang sore dan kerja di depan komputer terus menerus. Saya mau punya karir yang seru.

Tapi punya karir yang seru ngga segampang itu, kan? Kembali lagi ke pertanyaan "Nanti mau makan apa kalo gede?" dan pernyataan yang selalu ada diberikan semua orangtua pada anaknya ttg memilih jurusan "Cari yang gampang buat nyari kerjanya.."

Menjadi idealis berarti ngga bisa realistis, itu kesimpulan saya sejauh ini.

Saya kenal beberapa orang yang rela melepaskan impiannya demi punya prospek kerja yang cerah. Teman saya, dia sebenarnya ingin mengambil teknik penerbangan, namun karena prospek kerja di indonesia di bidang tsb ngga cerah, dia lalu mengambil jurusan yang sama dengan ayahnya dulu.

Saya masih bingung dengan pilihan yang harus saya ambil sebentar lagi.

Happy fasting, cheerio!
bises,
adelia

Alter Ego, Drama Queen, and Me.

An alter ego (Latin, "the other I") is a second self, a second personality or persona within a person. It was coined in the early nineteenth century when schizophrenia was first described by early psychologists.[1] A person with an alter ego is said to lead a double life.

Okay, not that serious. But dont you sometimes think that you have two parts, two (or more) personalities within you? I do. The first Adelia is the most positive girl in the world who always smiles and laughs and sings and feels good. The second one is the melodramatic Adelia. Its like umm, weird? Yeah call me a weirdo, because i am. When i'm having the melodramatic moments, seriously, you dont wanna know or get near me. I'll whine and complain and else. Wanna see a drama queen? You gotta see me. And when i'm done with that phase, i laugh and regret what ive done before. (okay my grammar sucks.)

That's what makes me suddenly feel guilty about one of my friends. Me and the other kids agree that she's soooo drama and hyperbolic. She tells us about her never ending love and life stories and it annoys us sooo damn much, especially me. But few days ago i had this thought, what if i'm just like this girl, what if i annoy my friends so much, just like her? I have no right to blame and hate her if i'm just the same kind of girl, right?

I called my fairly godmother, Ajay, immediately and told her what was on my mind. And like the others, she said "No, Adelia, stay calm, Youre way better than her." But somehow i just couldnt accept it just like that, i just feel guilty until now. What if the kind of girl that i hate is just her alter ego, just like me when having bad moments? Or maybe its just her? I have no idea.

Gosh, i thought i'll stop having these kind of things in my mind when i'm back home. I thought my senior year would be just all about studying. But i guess my teenage years are not over yet, or maybe it's just me? no idea.

Thats all for now,
Gros Bisous,
and i know my grammar sucks.
xoxoxo
Adelia

Update!

Hey dudes and dudettes!
Its been a super long time since my last post. Not that i dont wanna write anything, its just that the internet connection here is soo slow and annoying it makes me lazy to type, and i cant stand tying long paragraphs from my cell.

So my life has just begun (again) in the same old place but different surroundings. Ive started my 4th year of highschool back in SMA 8. Things are pretty good in school, i have some friends, my class is a blast, i love my fellow returnees, the lessons are still as crazy as always, well like ive said, its all okay. There are also some things that are pretty annoying for me, things that they call as Culture Shock. So many things are different from what we have back in France. Like how teachers mind about simple random things on their students, and the negative attitude that spreads throughout the school element, i dunno, am i just being to witty or its just the way it is in indonesia?

See, i cant share my opinions without looking like a snob who has been abroad. But yeah its all different here and there. My seniors are right, my real adventure begins not when i'm abroad but when i'm back in my natural country. Adapting will be harder here. Hope it'll be a blast too like last year.

Anywhoo. I dont think i can write as many as before. Senior year is pretty crazy, especially when you werent studying hard last year and go travelling instead lol. And i have to prepare for my SAT and TOEFL, i wanna go to Singapore Management University next year (wish me luck!) and also i have to study for UAN and SIMAK thingies because i'm scared that SMU is like too far away to reach. But i can already see myself living in spore next August :p Crossing Fingers! Last reason why i dont think i cant write like i did last year, i dont think my life has as much drama as last year. I have had enough drama for my adolescence years. Time to be an adult, i'm eighteen and its quite old (esp. im surrounded by sixteens and seventeens) I'd prefer to focus on SAT Vocabs than silly love stories like i did last year :) (But yeah, im still single and searching lol)

Okay, i gotta stop blabbering.
See ya!