Sometimes you need to look back and see how far you've come for. A tiny bit of pride can make you much stronger.

" How do you know what a dream is, if you never accomplished one?

How do you know what an adventure is, if you never took part in one? 

How do you know what anguish is, if you never said goodbye to your family and friends?

How do you know what diversity is, if you never lived under the same roof with people  
from all over the world? 

How do you know what tolerance is, if you never had to get used to something different 
 even though you didn't like it? 

How do you know what autonomy is, if you never had to decide anything by yourself?

How do you know what it means to grow up, if you never stopped being a child to start a 
 new course? 

How do you know what it means to be helpless, if you never wanted to hug someone and 
 had a computer screen preventing you from doing it?

How do you know what distance is, if you never said "I am so far away"?

How do you know what a language is, if you never had to learn one in order to make 
 friends?

How do you know what an opportunity is, if you never caught one?

How do you know what pride is, if you never experienced it while realizing how much you 
 have accomplished?

How do you know what it means to seize the day, if you never saw the 
 time running so fast?

How do you know what a friend is, if the circumstances never showed you the true ones? 

How do you know what a family is, if you never had one that supported you 
 unconditionally? 

How do you know what borders are, if you never crossed yours to see what there is on the 
 other side?

How do you know the world, if you have never been an exchange student? "


It's from one of my friends' facebook page, but it's been a while since these words appeared on AFS group. And it is nice, to see how far you've come, especially when you stumble upon the same questions all over again: what the hell am i dong here? what am i going to do with my life later? and hopefully, you'll come to a conclusion: this is worth the effort.

Good day to you!

Something that Kriza said

" Yeah, sometimes you need to take some space to know what you really want."

Roots before branches. You have to know who you are before knowing what you wanna be. I'm taking my space. I'm starting to know what I really want. Not done, but getting closer.

First world problem

I have trouble concentrating in one of my class. 

I keep picturing my friend as a fish ball.
I cant stop laughing.

Well maybe, just maybe...

Lately some of my friends got engaged or married. I'm happy for them, but i cant help thinking about their decision to settle down this fast. Well, 20-something is not that young, but still, how do you make yourself sure about that life changing decision you're about to make? I personally still doubt the concept of marriage, about living with someone for the rest of your life, having to deal with anything that may come, and of course, choosing the right one to undergo the journey together. Once again, how can you make yourself sure that he/she is the right choice? That everything's gonna be alright?

Moreover, i personally still don't get the idea of getting married young. I mean, you're young, you have to have many ambitions and random stuff to do on your list: from climbing Eiffel Tower to getting a PhD; from going on an eat-pray-love trip to winning a beauty pageant. Many things. I cant help but thinking that having a family and such commitment will bar you from doing what you really wanna do. For example, you can hardly take your hubby to USA, making him follow you there while you're doing your PhD research, right? (Well, that more likely happens to girls. Other things around will be different.) Why you wanna stop dreaming and complicate your way towards your life goal? I still don't get it. Maybe i am naive. Maybe i am just that selfish.

Some random thoughts last night.

I had trouble sleeping last night, and I just came to these series of thoughts. I somehow imagined if a celebrity suddenly appears in my life, and then we date for several months, and then ask me to marry him.. what would I say? Just say, it's Ian Somelhalder. Much older than I am, a kind gentleman, hot as hell, and well, rich. I'd probably say yes, no matter the consequences are. And then it hit me. I'd do such thing for a guy that i dont know (lie- i know many things about this guy lol), why wouldnt other people do the same for their loved ones? Well, maybe, just maybe, when you love someone so much, you'd do anything just to be with the person, and you'll be willing to leave anything behind, including your ambitions. Maybe. That's as much as I can get to understand my friends. I know I'm such a selfish brat, so I dont think I know better on this stuff.

Toodles.

To fall in love again

And I wanna fall in love with you again

I don't have to try, it's so easy

Who needs to pretend?
But because it's so funny

Let's just think about it honey

Let's just fall in love again

 

(Let's Fall In Love Again, Jason Castro)

 

((( Following the previous post: I watched the Magical Movie Concert. AMAZEBALLS. The Republic Cultural Centre'sConcert Room is slightly bigger than the one in YST Conservatory, but i still prefer the latter with its astounding sound quality and beautiful room. And of course, The Conservatory Orchestra played really really really well, and i once again fell in love with Jason Lai ( www.JasonLai.co.uk Go!). They played songs from Star Wars (never rly watched the series, but now loving the song); Titanic; Harry Potter (even more! Hedwig's Theme too!); Gone With the Wind, and many more. That was indeed a beautiful experience :) )))

 

Sooo. Falling in love. Some people brag about the beauty of falling in love, some say that it hurts (especially on those emo-esque twitter accounts and tumblrs). For me, falling in love ( or having crushes or flings) is always fun and exciting. I mean, with the jolt, rush, blush, and else? Yeah, that surely is fun. And before you think that i'm gonna be such a romantic dopey, no, i am not writing about that. I'll leave that to those cheesy twitter accounts you follow (admit it! lol).

 

Lately, I've been falling in love many times, easily: with life, and the many things it has to offer. No, I'm not exagerrating. Well, as i said on the previous post, i suddenly fell in love with that amazing 35 yo conductor (#fangirl) few days back. Today, i suddenly fell in love with Pokka's Peach Tea (where have you been all my life??). Also, I've just realized that i love the different accents i find here (I used to hate accents) and i find it interesting and appealing, well, and funny. What else. The $2 chicken rice at Clementi, Koi's Milk Tea, American politics, Obama's campaign, Mozart's Sonata in C, and many more. I guess finding new things, or facing old things in a new context, makes you see them in different point of view and appreciate it even more.

 

I'm not being overly positive or else, but i now know the saying "there's a light even in the darkest place" is true. There's always something good, even if you're not having a good time, you just have to stand back for awhile to find them (not that i'm complaining about my life). Finding new random things makes my day in daily basis. I mean, who knew that trying out new random drinks from the machine can make me this happy - and decide to write this post?

 

So, lemme be this kind of preaching person one more time: Life has so many things to offer: new things to see everyday and old things to see in a new perspective. Find those things, fall in love with them, whether it's new guy you encounter in your lame class, the simple Yong Tau Fu in your ever crowded canteen, or new songs you happen to hear in your french class, it doesnt matter. Keep your eyes open, expect life's latest surprises, dont take things for granted. You'll be surprised of the random things that can make you smile, and you'll find yourself loving your days even more. This way, you can make your crappiest days better, and live your happiest days even better. Well, at least, that's what i'm trying to do :) Falling in love is easy, and you dont even have to try. Well, as they say, when you know it, you know it. I'm leaving you (and me) with this sentence: dont be afraid to try new things, dont be afraid to fall in love over and over again. After all, falling in love is always fun, right?

Bisous,
A xxxx

 

(and no, it is not a sponsored post)

 

Concert and Ambitions.

So today i went to see a concert in Yong Siew Toh Conservatory of  music. Oh yeah, NUS has its own international conservatory which also has this amazing concert hall and a series of free concert. The 45-minute concert is the sneak peek of the orchestra's coming Magical Movie Music on Saturday. They played scores from Pirates of the Carribean, Gone With The Wind, some more, and... HARRY POTTER. You know that song heard when Harry's flying or playing quidditch? The title is Harry's Wondrous World. Hearing that in real orchestra version, like REAL music, wowed me. Breathtaking. Can hardly wait for the concert. 

Jason Lai, the conductor. Oh dear.

The concert left me with a thought... Conductor is the sexiest profession on earth. The hell with young executives with financial stability and else, conductors are much much much more appealing. Seriously. I'm so marrying someone from this conservatory. #EH

Bigger exposure on what world has to offer.

As i watch the concert and the wonderful scores, i went into the thoughtful part of my mind. yada yada yada, i suddenly realized that I am happy and content, and I cant ask for more. This is what I've always wanted. Being in a supportive environment to learn and develop yourself; exposed to the possibilities that you've never known; being in the best place to achieve what you want to achieve, knowing that your choices and efforts are the only thing that can get or bar you from what you want (well, except God). For me, those things popped in my mind when i was thinking about me sitting in the concert hall: I just finished a group meeting, I have these crazy long to do list, I gotta run errands, but here I am, still having time to squeeze in a concert to watch, swimming schedule, and social life. Yes this leaves me with major sleep deprivation, tight schedule, and love-hate relationship with my ever buzzing blackberry, but other than that I am extremely happy. I got the best of both worlds. And i said before, I am so grateful I cant ask for more. Alhamdulillah.

These past few weeks also opened my eyes, that there are more to life. There are limitless possibilities in the world that are waiting for me (and you). That you can actually be what you want to be, or in case you don't know what you wanna be, you can try as many thing as you want to get what you want, or just as a pursuit of happiness. 

There are more than just graduating from college and marriage and stable job. You can be a researcher, a professor, or anything. You can get as many degree as you want, and MONEY IS NOT A PROBLEM because if you try, there's always an answer, including on financial matters. There are more to life than just money and stability. Life is an adventure. Don't settle down, at least not yet. We're young and destined for something great. Carpe Diem, as The Dead Poet Society said.

Yes, there are more to life.

"You're young, of course you want to do many things! You have to do many things!" - Tommy Tjokro

"Trust me, this little town and little life wont be enough for you." - Klaus, The Vampire Diaries

My friends always say that I am ungrateful for being unsatisfied with my life and achievement, that I should be content with all I've already had and I shouldn't be too ambitious. My family don't like my ambition to pursue more and more on my education and adventure (after college), putting the stability and family plan behind. ( I am planning to get on my master degree before getting married, get as many adventures as possible, and have a high paying job before settling down. That means I will be at my late late 20s before thinking about marriage and kids and settling down. Most Indonesian people would reject the very idea). But then again, you only live once. I am not gonna die with a regret that I haven't done anything meaningful with my life. Not when I know i can do something about my life.

The notion of endless possibilities that have been exposed to me leaves me with a mental note: Don't stop, don't settle down just yet. There are more to life: bigger things, meaningful things. It is okay if you're not satisfied with what you have, that will make you strive for more. And when you strive for more, you do more, you will find even a bigger world. Wanting more is okay, it's a human nature. Be happy, don't forget to be thankful, and be content, but don't stop to get something more.  Because there are always more to life.

Toodles.

Singapore. Sept 12, 2012.

The stoner has a good point

Yep, that guy from Harold and Kumar (who actually is a political activist too). He's not stoned, and the speech is really good. No difficult and big words or advice, yet inspiring -in his own way.

"Enjoy your journey, especially as you're doing things that you don't entirely wanna do. And talk to people who disagree with you. Their perspective might change your mind for the better.... that does not mean you have to be that annoying person that says 'everything happens for a reason!'. Everything does not happen for a reason. Sometimes really terrible things happen, and sometimes there's no reason. Sometimes amazing things also happen and there's no reason either. I think that's the beauty in the magic of life."

"It's okay if your interests change, and people call you crazy..... Happiness can come from something other than financial security.... People might call you crazy, and that's not a bad thing. I've never had a friend who was called crazy who didn't do something awesome. They struggled, but they did something awesome.."

"Take risks, because i think you only really fail when you choose to give up... You should move to a city that freaks you out, you should take a job that you're nervous about taking... So if you wanna do something in you enjoy doing it, just don't give up. Take risks, because you only really fail when you choose to give up."

"So as you grab your fake diploma, the important thing to take with you, in my humble opinion, is the notion of endless possibility.... I hope you wear your craziness as a badge of honors. I hope you define success for yourselves... Go do crazy things, go do them with a smile."